Turnip Boy Robs a Bank Review | Xbox Series X

The saying goes - If it's not broken, don't fix it, and if it's popular, then milk that sucker until it's drier than a desert in summer. This has been the motto for the gaming industry for quite a few years now, with a near-constant barrage of remakes, sequels, spin-offs, and ports. We, as gamers, need a hero, a hero that is small and stout, whose flesh would probably taste great in soup. We are, of course, talking about none other than one of gaming's greatest and most stoic protagonists, Turnip Boy, and this time, the metaphorical gloves are off in Turnip Boy Robs a Bank.

 

The sequel was made by the same studio that made the first Turnip Boy game, that, of course, being none other than Snoozy Kazoo. This studio, based in Western Massachusetts, consists of only seven members and was founded in the same year the first Turnip Boy game was released. Now, what sort of goals would they have with such a small team and an incredibly handsome protagonist? Why make small, short, and “dumb as heck” games such as the Turnip Boy series? As stated on their website, Sleepy Kazoo wants to make games that are light-hearted and allow people to momentarily escape from all the seriousness of life, a very commendable goal.

For those who have not been keeping up with our rooty-tooty Turnip hero, Turnip Boy Robs a Bank is our hero's second adventure, the first being 2021’s Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion. This first game has us play as the titular hero, who has sadly failed to pay his taxes and is in massive debt to none other than the wretched Mayor Onion. Turnip Boy then needs to solve the many ‘plantastic’ puzzles and help out the other residents of the town, who are also in debt to the Mayor. You will encounter many strange characters and dangerous bosses and uncover a shocking mystery. While that is the premise, the actual game is full of jokes, gags, and humor, and as you can probably tell, the game doesn't take itself seriously in the slightest.

Now, after successfully committing tax evasion, what could be next for Turnip Boy? Turnip Boy Robs a Bank is set only a few months after the events of the first game; Turnip Boy receives a call from a familiar stranger, a stranger whom Turnip Boy knows from his old life. The stranger in question is none other than the leader of the notorious Pickled gang. He tells us that he wants Turnip Boy to continue his father's legacy, who turns out to be an infamous vegetable mafia, Don! The legacy in question is having us rob the biggest bank in Veggieland, the Botanical Bank. Things won't be easy; there's more to this bank than meets the eye, and Turnip Boy needs to uncover all of the bank's secrets before the fuzz rocks up and stops you and your gang.

 

In Turnip Boy Robs a Bank, you aren't given many actions to perform. This may come across as a bit bare bones, but that is the beauty of the game, as it very much lives up to the developer’s motto of making simple and easy games. As for these basic actions, Turnip Boy will be able to attack either with a melee weapon or with a ranged gun because there needs to be guns in Turnip Boy Robs a Bank! While melee deals a lot more damage, it's also very slow. On the other hand, guns are fast but don't deal that much damage until much later on. In most scenarios, you might find yourself utilizing ranged weapons over most, just don't run out of ammo.

As for other actions, Turnip Boy has the astounding ability to trip over any and all surfaces, this wonderful ability will act as your dodge. You will either need to dodge from oncoming enemy attacks or you will need to dodge through any obstacles blocking your path. Another action Turnip Boy can do is the incredibly lucrative Shakedown. When robbing the bank, you will stumble upon hapless and apparently very wealthy bank customers. You can then approach them to perform a shakedown; some customers are wealthier than others, and this is often shown visually. The fancier the fruit or vegetable, the more money you make it rain, literally.

Aside from enemies and customers, weapon pickups are one of the most important things you will encounter. Weapon pickups are probably one of the funniest features in Turnip Boy Robs a Bank, as each weapon behaves entirely differently from one another. No better example of this is the gun pick-ups, which can range from silly, such as a multi-barrel cactus gun, to incredibly overpowered, like the rocket cannon or Machine gun. As for Melee Weapons, they are much less a visual extravaganza but are just as fun and creative. While you still do a slower attack and heavy damage, some melee weapons can knock back, and others can attack twice. The best part is you can keep the weapons you pick up after you get a successful run!

 

If you can successfully complete a run and keep some of these weapons with you when you head back to base, you can give them to one of the Tomato Twins, who will use these weapons for weapon research and allow you to have better starting equipment. This is not the only service available to you at your base of operations, as you will also be able to access the DarkWeb. This shady store allows you to purchase many useful items that allow you to make even more ill-gotten wealth, from pickaxes that mine sculptures to Dynamite that lets you blow open safe doors. However, if you want something to improve your stats, then luckily, your hideout is equipped with a nifty vending machine packed full of Whey Protein and Canada's greatest specialty, Bagged Milk. Once you're fully decked out and tidied up, it's time to get to robbing.

The main gameplay loop of Turnip Boy Robs a Bank is simple: you crash into a bank, get as much cash as possible in a very limited amount of time, and head back to base to upgrade or change your loadout. The gameplay can be repetitive sometimes, but luckily, there is a bit of RNG in the game in the form of elevators. These metal boxes are completely randomized, so there's no telling where you're going. Most of the time, you'll land on a floor with enemies and the occasional safe that needs to be lasered open, but if you're lucky, you'll come across side quests. These side quests, like the rest of the game, are incredibly silly, like handing a man with PTSD his divorce papers or giving “exposure bucks” to a struggling artist. These side quests do come in handy as they can give you various rewards, from stylish hats to useful hints. You will likely not miss that many side quests, as many seem to have a natural progression system that follows the story quite nicely.

While regular enemies are something of a massive cakewalk, Bosses, on the other hand, are an entirely different story. Many enemies tend to go down in one or two hits; bosses take a lot more time, patience, and practice. These bosses don't exactly slam a break on the gameplay, but they do slow it down quite a bit, though this isn't really a bad thing, as without them, Turnip Boy Robs a Bank (which is a short game) would somehow be even shorter. Many of the bosses are entirely unique to each other and many will require you to mix up your skills and loadouts to be more effective.

 

As mentioned earlier, the bosses do slow the game down, but in a very good way. Much like the first game, Turnip Boy Robs a Bank is an incredibly short experience, being roughly 4 hours long, and can easily be played in its entirety in just one sitting. Many would see this as a downside, but it's quite the opposite; the game is filled with jokes and humor, and these very same jokes wouldn't be the same if the game went on and on and on. This is the biggest killer of comedic games because by the end of the game, the jokes aren't funny anymore, and you wish you were done with it. This isn't the same for Turnip Boy Robs a Bank; its short length never lets its jokes go stale and, instead, makes them incredibly memorable.

Everything in Turnip Boy Robs a Bank shows that the developers put a lot of love in this game, which shows in every corner of it. Clearly, the devs didn't want to do their game injustice by dragging it out longer than it needs to be, and it shows up where it matters most, in sound and in visuals. The Soundtrack in Turnip Boy Robs a Bank is solid as hell; the tunes are all upbeat and adorable, much like our perpetually smiling protagonist. Even in intense scenes, the music is always chipper and keeps you weirdly in the zone. It seems like 2024 already had quite a few audio gems this year.

 

Turnip Boy Robs a Bank is overall a great experience and a must-play for those who did get to play the prequel. The game is as good as the first and builds upon what the other set out. There are far more gameplay aspects to the game, such as RNG, pickups, and upgrades, but at its core, it is still just Turnip Boy. The game never rushes you, and it never overstays its welcome. Its jokes are funny, witty, and self-aware, and the gameplay is an addictive loop that will keep you occupied for its entire runtime.

Daman Shelley (@UndeadandTired)
Editor, NoobFeed