Never There

You never see me,

Until I screw up

You never say you love me enough

We aren't close, you don't know me

You judge me and insult me

I'll never be a good enough daughter

We'll never understand each other

We are dysfunctional

You don't give a d*mn about me

You all hate me

I'm the screw up of the family

You never see the truth behind my lies

You never look past my eyes,

To see the pain that's hiding there

You don't understand me

You want me gone

You blame me for all your problems

How am I supposed to replace the love you tore away from me?

How much longer will you make me suffer?

I feel useless here

I know it wouldn't matter to you all if I lived or died

You know I've tried to get out of your lives

I was unsuccessful both times

I bet you were disappointed in me

I have no reason to make you proud

Would you cry if I tried again and

Actually succeeded?

I'm bleeding and tearing apart

You say I'm getting better

But you don't know the half of it

I'm getting worse, the only difference is...

My breaking point isn't as short

All you do is criticize me

My self-esteem is at its lowest point

You're never there for me

I don't understand

Isn't family supposed to always be there for you?

No, not for them

They couldn't care less if something happened to me

Why can't you just go back to hitting me?

It was a hell of a lot better than killing me with words

A bruise can heal…

But these words you've screamed at me continuously...

They never leave

They are a permanent scar on my heart

You all will be the death of me…