Pinball Planet

Mobile games have evolved quite a bit since their breach into popular culture, though the medium is still a favorite for the casual time waster. As such, a throwback like Pinball Planet will always find an potential audience for the age-old arcade genre. If that in itself is enough to make it a viable option is a whole different matter. If anything, this project suffers from not realizing how time affects releases, making it completely outdated.

Its theme is aptly put right in the title, so at least it has that right. It’s a pinball game, where different tables are set on a spherical planet. Unfortunately, beating in that setting doesn’t make for a manageable interface. Twirling around a planet to find a game is needlessly confusing. To unlock playing fields, it’s necessary to invest stars, which can be obtained from high scores and the completion of certain challenges.

After receiving the first location, it’s time to see how this arcade titles fares. From its opening screen, it’s apparent that Pinball Planet isn’t a looker in any sense. Visuals are blocky and void of nuance. Themes like a pirate ship or a mine do try to paint some color, but its basic representation leaves much to be desired. Textures are plain, tables are mostly barren and shapes are so jagged that even the ball is more of a polyhedron. A simple animation here or there may liven things up a little, but certainly not enough to make up for how ancient these visuals are. This is going to need be a gameplay above all sort of game, certainly as stumpy sound effects only hammer in the shoddy presentation.

Sadly so, Pinball Planet is only barely functional as a game as well. Mechanically, the game works, in the way that if the side of the screen is tapped, the flipper will react, to expel the ball forward into one of a handful of interactive objects. Mast posts can fall if their balance is perturbed. A passing mining cart can be shot off its tracks to collect the goods inside. Each table also has one or two special events, such as the screen rotating. That’s about the breadth of things. There is extremely little variation to be had. A multiball, maybe; some coins, every few minutes; all other moments are encapsulated as the flipper bouncing the ball, waiting for it to return, waiting, and repeating. Where even a physical pinball game would be built on constant stimuli, Pinball Planet is only able to trickle in any excitement. There’s just not that much to do.

Making matters worse, unlocking a new table will take a considerable amount of time, effectively forcing a grinding period on the same location. Random challenges can include arbitrary things such as playing badly to unlock stars. It’s more of a chore list than anything organically achieved. Additionally, a level progression system allows for permanent upgrades to be activated, though the payoff is minor for a long waiting period as well. Temporary boosts can also be bought with stars, but that only amplifies the grind problem. Pinball Planet is slow, boring and offers few incentives in return.

Perhaps the biggest crime of Pinball Planet is that it doesn’t even function properly. On a tablet more than capable to run the better of its peers, the arcade title experiences such slowdown that it becomes an anticipation guessing game. Inputs react full seconds later, killing any precision necessary to play. It’s unforgiveable for this application to run so poorly, especially given how oversimplified it is in the first place.

To top it off, Pinball Planet is a paid product. It demands a pittance, like any mobile game, but in a market where it’s outdone by dozens of free competitors, its offerings are made absolutely redundant.

There are leagues of better titles to consider, before Pinball Planet shows up on the radar. Its arcade gameplay is basic, lacks content and isn’t even as operational as its bland look would make it seem. It’s a fully archaic item in a market far beyond its capabilities.

Daav Valentaten, NoobFeed (@Daavpuke)